tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-58400612011-07-08T08:03:12.150+08:00pseudo emoeugnoreply@blogger.comBlogger4431100tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5840061.post-80657099952983582452009-11-14T06:37:00.003+08:002009-11-14T06:57:02.686+08:00hindsighti'll admit, i do resort to blogging to say this, because i've apologised so many times, online and offline, for what i did before.i guess, looking inward, i've been really judgemental (towards you in particular), and given what i've been doing, i don't really have the right to be that way.you've heard it all before, so i shan't go all broken-record on you. if you'll let me, however, i'd eugnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5840061.post-59279810750656574272009-10-13T08:28:00.001+08:002009-10-13T08:29:17.226+08:00goodbyeyou know, i'll be forever kicking myself for not making the time to go get that haircut with you.eugnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5840061.post-47364060385695033332009-07-10T20:51:00.002+08:002009-07-10T21:17:52.880+08:00turtlesi'm looking at my brother's two horny pet turtles (they keep climbing on top of each other), and i feel like smashing their shells to get at the meat within.now on a somewhat related note, i just realised that baron's strong brew is very very aptly named... likewise for the "very strong brew".eugnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5840061.post-34682573676904020982009-07-06T13:16:00.000+08:002009-07-06T13:17:21.012+08:00creepYou float like a featherIn a beautiful worldI wish I was specialYou're so fuckin' specialBut I'm a creep,I'm a weirdoWhat the hell am I doin' here?I don't belong hereeugnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5840061.post-20783429470858493562009-07-02T01:00:00.001+08:002009-07-02T01:01:45.452+08:00fear i guess that's what's been bugging me this far. just where i'll find the strength, i dunno.eugnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5840061.post-52698838122500883722009-06-30T12:20:00.002+08:002009-06-30T12:39:15.601+08:00shed your skinso it seems that i've gotta let go of everything here and go in 2 months, to something new that awaits me.is that why i'm feeling so much discomfort and detachment? eugnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5840061.post-83685107491495712532009-06-28T14:47:00.003+08:002009-06-28T15:22:15.782+08:00youthoutloudjust breath-taking... that's how it felt. from being an audition judge, being part of the stage crew, making an impromptu speech, and taking to the stage amid screaming teens, felt like a more-than-proper reward for all we'd put ourselves through. i'll post photos and videos soon.at the end of the day, no matter what comes our way, i'm yours and i always will be. thank you, love, for eugnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5840061.post-17599784731216714582009-06-13T09:33:00.002+08:002009-06-13T09:39:43.606+08:00turn the other cheekgive without hope of receivingloving those who condemn youoffer your other cheek to those who strike youhow on earth does it work? eugnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5840061.post-7712212855304521242009-06-04T01:39:00.002+08:002009-06-04T01:42:09.488+08:00blessed union of souls dear s, i can safely say i've never met you, despite having heard of you. and you probably won't read this or realise i'm referring to you, should you chance upon it. but i'm really glad and happy for you. eugnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5840061.post-74295915422555093352009-05-31T13:31:00.002+08:002009-05-31T13:40:26.019+08:00pater noster"et ne nos inducas in tentationemsed libera nos a malo"i've a long way to go, when it comes to being more loving in general.eugnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5840061.post-47994297888162162692009-05-16T19:23:00.003+08:002009-05-17T01:48:39.106+08:00inner demonsi'm in one of those moods where i'm fully rational, and in a completely honest mood. i guess this blog entry's ripe for the picking then.perhaps i should face each of my inner demons one by one. there's:-an utter lack of self-confidence-an overwhelming pessimism-a serious lack of faith-an overall jaded feeling~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~dear eugene, by the time you read this, you will either eugnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5840061.post-76214755932028597352009-04-19T20:48:00.002+08:002009-04-19T20:51:24.608+08:00of ice cream and bridge"two in love can make it,take my heart and please don't break it;love was made for me and you" now what remains of us four? just two. ah, those halcyon days.eugnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5840061.post-70968136801786058942009-03-09T13:39:00.001+08:002009-03-09T13:42:52.719+08:00quis custodiet ipsos custodes?"There must be some kind of way out of here,"Said the joker to the thief.“There's too much confusion,I can't get no relief.Businessmen, they drink my wine,Plowmen dig my earth.None of them along the lineKnow what any of it is worth.” “No reason to get excited,”The thief he kindly spoke.“There are many here among usWho feel that life is but a joke.But you and I, eugnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5840061.post-16824299790311467222009-02-22T18:30:00.001+08:002009-02-22T18:32:15.832+08:00anxietyi can't shake this fear. i don't even know what i'm afraid of, honestly, or what i even have to fear. or maybe it's just a sunday evening and i'm dreading the week ahead. God, give me strength...eugnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5840061.post-23092481031450686602009-02-01T20:13:00.003+08:002009-02-01T22:44:39.453+08:00foresight, at last"To think I might not see those eyesMakes it so hard not to cryAnd as we say our long goodbyeI nearly do""Run" - Snow Patroli am a dumbass for letting this song get the better of me. but i think, come september, this is what i'll have on replay in my head.eugnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5840061.post-50127944763678917422009-01-31T16:20:00.003+08:002009-02-06T20:28:23.998+08:00lazyyes that's the mood for today, or rather how i've been the past few days. to begin with, i can't stop saying thank you to the BFC, ED and my catechism classmates for that surprise (yes, it turned out to be anyway) party on the 26th. i've not felt love so overwhelming in a while, or maybe i've been blind to it all along. but that really hit the spot, so thanks guys :D life's been smooth. if eugnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5840061.post-81401525404278817342009-01-25T00:02:00.001+08:002009-01-25T00:10:05.850+08:00a realisationi guess one only learns the true meaning of the word "love", when he truly needs to.eugnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5840061.post-42833858852629074162009-01-06T07:19:00.003+08:002009-01-06T08:11:43.030+08:00ave caesar, morituri te salutant!(hail caesar, we who are about to die salute you!)it's pronounced "kai-sar", and no, i am not contemplating suicide.was thinking of a proper resolution to make for 2009, and couldn't come up with anything. ironically after the feast of epiphany last sunday i had one of my own, and what i've decided on is painfully obvious: resolve. yep, my resolution for this yeareugnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5840061.post-56138139157174323232008-12-22T17:28:00.000+08:002008-12-22T17:29:57.978+08:00oh, pek kong, pek kong.woohoo says:yupwoohoo says:thankslil' boy blues says:np nplil' boy blues says:HAHAHAHA oh man, those two letters.lil' boy blues says:sorry sorrywoohoo says:assholeeugnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5840061.post-89756681086699754652008-12-22T09:07:00.002+08:002008-12-22T09:09:32.908+08:00funkthis one blew me right off my chair.eugnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5840061.post-55508346576768675452008-12-19T18:10:00.002+08:002008-12-19T18:15:10.319+08:00suaysometimes, i think i'm just so unlucky (whoops, i shouldn't swear), that whenever something goes right, i think myself lucky. or when things are shit, i manage to find optimism somehow. so now, i can deduce that with things the way they are, optimism having deserted me and all, i must have hit a new low for bad luck."if it weren't for bad luck, i wouldn't have no luck at all" - "Born Under A eugnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5840061.post-5437126446445762732008-12-13T15:32:00.001+08:002008-12-13T15:35:18.290+08:00soul foodMoon river, wider than a mileI'm crossing you in style somedayYou dream maker, you heartbreakerWherever youre going I'm going your wayTwo drifters off to see the worldThere's such a lot of world to seeWe're after the same rainbows endWaiting round the bendMy huckleberry friend, moon riverAnd meeugnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5840061.post-52166168059528788582008-12-09T15:36:00.002+08:002008-12-09T15:53:59.832+08:00this is eugene's head, so far:"and till the last flower dies... =D""i don't understand you, really. but maybe that's because i don't know enough. and if you would just let me in on it, i would understand and not judge.""reparations?""ORD LOOOOOO!""bored at work, and there's three and a half hours more.""death is weird, because it can destroy one's composure, and in the aftermath restore it with eugnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5840061.post-53083075893709130522008-11-24T13:42:00.002+08:002008-11-24T13:49:37.431+08:00remember?In open fields of wild flowersShe breathes the air flies awayShe thanks her Jesus for the daisies and the rosesIn no simple languageSomeday she'll understand the meaning of it allHe's more than the laughterOr the stars in the heavensAs close as a heartbeatOr a song on her lipsSomeday she'll trust himAnd learn how to see himSomeday he'll call herAnd she will come runningFall in his arms, eugnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5840061.post-22521568683710041702008-11-21T11:20:00.002+08:002008-11-21T11:30:14.036+08:00discomfort7:36a.m. - pack of tissue paper is down to five sheets. am trying to maximise usage of each ply; my relentless nose just won't stop dripping.8:15a.m.- out of tissue paper. SHIT! will definitely not resort to stealing toilet paper from the staff latrine.8:16a.m. - drip drip.8:18a.m. - sniffle sniffle.8:30a.m. - am making headway on work. almost too much headway. sniffle.8:45a.m. - now eugnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5840061.post-71830677183568173452008-11-18T23:40:00.001+08:002008-11-19T07:50:12.885+08:00this is it.i'm free.no more ns.heavy heart?no no. free.eugnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5840061.post-78110802162269777702008-11-03T00:02:00.002+08:002008-11-03T00:05:11.075+08:00this must be iti feel hurt when you do.i feel happy when you are.but the former seems to apply more today, and i feel immensely pissed. at not being able to do anything about it.give me about 10 to 15 more years, and i'll see that their children don't even get an education. yes, i'm quite the spiteful bitch, i should never be put in power. but that's my decision to make, i reckon. heh.eugnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5840061.post-71309276332761875042008-10-26T22:26:00.003+08:002008-10-26T22:33:03.654+08:00cigaretteit's times like this that make me wonder why i don't smoke.oh i forgot, it's too bloody expensive, and there are better ways of letting it all out.on a possibly unrelated note, i've stopped taking pocket money from my parents. for about a year and eight months or so.think, think back to that day when all spelt "contentment". eugnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5840061.post-37683897848156047462008-10-21T19:34:00.003+08:002008-10-21T19:45:17.489+08:00nirvanait seems that everything is coming around, full circle... just a week ago i felt things were all taking a downhill plunge, and today i find that nothing could be better. confusing, really.and yet, despite all the things i should be unhappy about, i am content.let every day i live from now on draw inspiration from this day, i pray. Thank you, God.eugnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5840061.post-17094460429051485632008-10-13T22:48:00.002+08:002008-10-13T23:03:12.264+08:00limbosometimes i take a look at myself, then at other people, and wonder if there's anything wrong. true, i don't go out all that often, i'm perfectly comfortable lying around with a good book on a quiet day... so why does my long weekend break feel empty and dry?maybe i need to stop putting expectations on everything i see and interact with. i'm sure i'd be a lot less jaded, and a lot happier. ieugnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5840061.post-60914542802645294742008-10-07T19:44:00.002+08:002008-10-07T20:08:11.745+08:00servant of the secret fireyou have only 35 days left to make things difficult for me. in terms of working days, even less.i am letting go of all this shit. i am not going through the trouble of mentioning who i am addressing in this entry, simply because the people who read this will know; moreover the backlash for having actively "flamed" someone in name is not worth sacrificing the joy of ORD eugnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5840061.post-52048380395266021692008-10-03T01:02:00.002+08:002008-10-03T01:21:36.855+08:00i was just thinkingfast mover + hypocriteand then?i've let go. but it's just something i realised today, that doesn't really irk me as much as it makes me chuckle.i mean no enmity, but this is really a GAHMEN moment, no? and to think i only realised now.yes, something that gave me food for thought, apart from the events of today.to jea: we finally have time! i'm clearing leave before Operation eugnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5840061.post-6309172022267687332008-09-21T01:43:00.004+08:002008-09-21T02:05:59.924+08:00despairi realise:that i have lost all the desire to lead, especially at work.that i was a fool, an idealistic one at that, to believe that i could change things, to prove that even conscripts could excel in this dog-eat-dog environment.that i was naive to expect a reward for hard, honest work.that i was played, just like a cheap whore.will the 12th of november bring a triumphant victory i so eugnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5840061.post-41810850600789319892008-09-20T10:15:00.001+08:002008-09-20T10:17:13.402+08:00getting byWhat would you think if I sang out of tune,Would you stand up and walk out on meLend me your ears and I'll sing you a songAnd I'll try not to sing out of keyOh, I get by with a little help from my friendsMm, I get high with a little help from my friendsMm, gonna try with a little help from my friendsWhat do I do when my love is away(Does it worry you to be alone)How do I feel by the endeugnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5840061.post-19610469296668890952008-09-16T15:11:00.002+08:002008-09-16T15:15:41.078+08:00how i wishhow i wish you were herewe're just two lost souls swimming in a fish bowlyear after yearrunning over the same old groundwhat have you found?the same old fearswish you were hereeugnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5840061.post-27839349937631284442008-09-04T00:53:00.002+08:002008-09-04T00:59:56.486+08:00you just have to knowthat you're not on your own, no matter how it seems eugnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5840061.post-51819828207122829332008-08-28T20:08:00.003+08:002008-08-28T20:13:09.414+08:00it's apparently the best medicine, so...enjoy!knew there was something supernatural about his 8 gold medal streak...that's another possible reason. hahahaha!eugnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5840061.post-26245806775144715632008-08-28T14:39:00.001+08:002008-08-28T14:42:53.619+08:00happy as a man can be eugnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5840061.post-87531573511721513632008-08-27T13:36:00.002+08:002008-08-27T13:58:08.988+08:00"the sky is cryin', can't you see the tears flow down the street"Every day I grew blinder.Thought I was strong,Didn't need nobody.But the strongest river-It can't flow up hill. -Paul Butterfield,"In My Own Dream"they say the night is darkest just before the dawn. they didn't mention how cold it'd be either...honestly, i feel like i'm not gonna hold out much longer. i feel like i might just eugnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5840061.post-36620938900654253452008-08-21T16:27:00.002+08:002008-08-21T16:31:38.525+08:00o ye of little faith..."From the four winds — from all directions — come, O Spirit, and breathe into that which has been slain and bring them to life"be life-giving, life-giving. must set my head straight on it.eugnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5840061.post-44219369273423577392008-08-19T15:46:00.003+08:002008-08-22T17:32:02.821+08:00IT'S TIME FOR...an update inspired by BACARDI and 7UP! it's your fault for leaving the rum out in the open, dad. especially with the 7UP next to it. HAHAHA!okay, in all seriousness (why so serious? okay that has been seriously overquoted.), why am i blogging? why am i not calling someone else to talk about this? i mean i'm sure this isn't important, but i'd listen to anyone who called anyway. eugnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5840061.post-88973436182441676202008-08-18T20:05:00.002+08:002008-08-18T20:20:57.791+08:00what the doctor ordered?one day of no-lifing at home makes me wonder if clearing one weeks worth of off days was actually worth it...think it'll be better tomorrow.or maybe even tonight... heh.might even be time to take stock, yet again, and see what needs be done to iron out the kinks in my life.or is there even anything i can do at this present moment?eugnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5840061.post-11486436841445255192008-08-18T11:36:00.002+08:002008-08-18T11:41:13.027+08:00whip out your beer bottles, because... eugnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5840061.post-59023594872892743642008-07-31T22:56:00.003+08:002008-08-01T02:43:48.771+08:00the bluesright, it's been a week since i updated (and ranted), so here we go. people often wonder what this strange genre (in the sense that it's really not mainstream) that i listen to really is. there are so many things that define the blues, and what the blues represent, so i won't go into that. i haven't really been played by any woman (maybe i have, but it's not how B.B. King or Buddy Guy oreugnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5840061.post-45086047994048886902008-07-25T17:11:00.006+08:002008-07-25T17:20:42.183+08:00WHAT THE FUCKsometimes that's all you need to yell, to justify how screwed you feel inside.to vent your frustration at the frailties of the human spirit, the vulnerabilities of the heart.and to those whose ears i've seared by uttering this profanity,FUCK FUCK FUCKITY FUCK FUCKFUCK!indeed, now i feel much better. this is one of the things i don't regret learning from the army.eugnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5840061.post-19002444906559711652008-07-21T08:08:00.002+08:002008-07-21T08:10:47.889+08:00the day the music diedyou know there are those days when you feel like keeling over and dying?not gonna elaborate more. this is one of those days.eugnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5840061.post-4949681799673049902008-07-18T00:23:00.003+08:002008-07-18T00:59:04.099+08:00souped up bluesWell you've heard about love givin sight to the blindMy baby's lovin' cause the sun to shineShe's my sweet little thing, she's my pride and joyShe's my sweet little baby, I'm her little lover boyYeah I love my baby, heart and soulLove like ours won't never grow oldShe's my sweet little thing, she's my pride and joyShe's my sweet little baby, I'm her little lover boyYeah I love my eugnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5840061.post-16154853637632555902008-07-11T16:44:00.002+08:002008-07-11T17:19:44.560+08:00just what my head neededsurprisingly, that was a lot of insight i got from speaking with val last night. so thanks much val, that helped put some things in perspective :)it's just that well, all this pain and hurt could be completely avoided. and that is my stand, despite what you all might tell me. i'm just a spectator, and that's my viewpoint. i refuse to be involved any further. so there we goeugnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5840061.post-26446738148365148112008-07-09T18:52:00.003+08:002008-07-09T19:38:01.909+08:00the dark knighti realise, that no matter how many times i try to look away from something i can't seemingly change, another situation of the same magnitude rears it's ugly ass. i guess i won't know till i've tried. to help things, to ignore them, either way.well, i have tried. of course! but i get shot down so many times. either it's not appropriate, it's not the right time, OR (as much as i'd eugnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5840061.post-86594149603553838242008-07-07T21:06:00.002+08:002008-07-07T21:22:01.123+08:00highway starNobody gonna take my girlI'm gonna keep her to the endNobody gonna have my girlShe stays close on every bendOooh she's a killer machineShe's got everythingLike a movin' mouth, body control, and everythingI LOVE HERI NEED HERI SEED HERYEAH she turns me onAlrightHold tightI'm a highway star-"Highway Star" by Deep Purpleit feels so surreal, i'd have never imagined i'd own a real americaneugnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5840061.post-40086953331803854862008-07-05T11:20:00.002+08:002008-07-05T11:44:09.970+08:00dedicated to the one i loved (no, the other one.)she was blonde, beautiful, and curvaceous; an instant fit in my hands. i remember the late nights spent with her in my arms, the way she would squeal, moan and scream... but now, all that's left of that is a painful and distant memory, that i must forget. i will move on.just in case you perverts were wondering, i was talking about my now-defunct eugnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5840061.post-45907575357642179812008-07-03T14:10:00.000+08:002008-07-03T14:14:27.891+08:00amerika (ist wunderbar)most often it's hindsight that gives me a different perspective on things.but i could certainly use someone else's take on things, to shift my paradigm a little.eugnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5840061.post-81338659383464260452008-07-02T03:17:00.002+08:002008-07-02T03:30:01.977+08:00SIMI L*N J*AOWHY LIKE THAT WHY LIKE THAT WHY LIKE THATWHY LIKE THAT WHY LIKE THAT WHY LIKE THATWHY LIKE THAT WHY LIKE THAT WHY LIKE THATWHY LIKE THAT WHY LIKE THAT WHY LIKE THATWHY LIKE THAT WHY LIKE THAT WHY LIKE THATWHY LIKE THAT WHY LIKE THAT WHY LIKE THATWHY LIKE THAT WHY LIKE THAT WHY LIKE THATWHY LIKE THAT WHY LIKE THAT WHY LIKE THATWHY LIKE THAT WHY LIKE THAT WHY LIKE THATWHY LIKE THAT WHYeugnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5840061.post-43995497815928256352008-06-28T10:02:00.005+08:002008-06-28T17:02:39.578+08:00stocktake (part II)so i was thinking of how far i've come, travelled, progressed (maybe). so this part, which might not be the last, will document how NS has been, thus far. I think it's alright to sum it up at this point, because all that remains is to finish up my remaining duty days, and start the ORD clearance process. (i'm probably steering off topic, so i won't ramble on about NS procedureseugnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5840061.post-78105113254029598532008-06-27T09:56:00.003+08:002008-06-27T10:47:36.882+08:00stocktake (part I)alright, this is supposed to be an entry on the journey (taking stock of what's happened around me) thus far, but i think i'm going to consolidate my thoughts, and probably follow up with it in part II.but last night's kopitiam session with Gil, Boom and Les was rather impactful, in the sense that... i realise how damn stupid lots of things are.like the junta in myanmar, who eugnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5840061.post-22065284699282132322008-06-24T11:48:00.002+08:002008-06-24T11:56:48.064+08:00je crois en toiTout seulTu t'en iras tout seulCoeur ouvertA L'universPoursuis ta queteSans regarder derriereN'attends pasQue le jourSe leveSuis ton etoileVa jusqu'ou ton reve t'emporteUn jour tu le toucherasSi tu crois, si tu crois, si tu crois, en toiSuis la lumiereN'eteins pas la flamme que tu portesAu fonds de toi souviens-toiQue je crois, que je crois, que je crois, en toiloosely translated, eugnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5840061.post-62780146812579168992008-06-21T11:45:00.002+08:002008-06-21T12:09:42.072+08:00i can't get no satisfaction (well, actually i can)okay, an update! well actually my thoughts on things. to start off, i'm not plagiarising this webcomic, i'm posting it! go find it at this link: http://ctrlaltdel-online.com/comic.php?d=20070331a fitting tribute to all those who are pissed with windows vista, like i am. hahaha!i realise, at the end of the day, that i'm actually quite happy and eugnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5840061.post-45310722610657444522008-06-20T06:33:00.003+08:002008-06-20T06:42:35.075+08:00loyalty and fealty"we must never let our feelings get in the way of our operational duties" -1WO _____"it's good to see that not all guys are bastards" - a good friend"for the Jews, the heart was a place of decision, and so by "love with all your heart", they loved with God with their decision. if you love with your feelings, then the relationship will be a rollercoaster- up and down, and so on" eugnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5840061.post-52250728581425938912008-06-04T10:46:00.004+08:002008-06-04T11:00:01.642+08:00remniscencei couldn't help but remember rather vividly how things were on grad night, having stepped into the marina mandarin hotel, looking for a place to pee (haha yes, very retarded. but not many toilets are open in town at midnight), after watching iron man with jea yesterday. before you harp on the fact that this is absolutely slow and laggy of us, i shall... remniscence. about how nervous ieugnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5840061.post-66450086546405874842008-05-25T19:03:00.002+08:002008-05-25T19:12:46.913+08:00abaddonit's been a blue, sluggish and slow week.ah, what the heck.eugnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5840061.post-49095959500543688852008-05-16T17:10:00.002+08:002008-05-16T17:57:22.255+08:00hope/despairWhen the world weighs on your shouldersThrough sorrow and your despairWith everything, with every breath, praise the Lordeverything looks like shit from this point of view. nothing seems to be right. and as much as i try to remind myself "God has a reason for all this, and is trying to tell me something", i don't see it.quietlyi don't see the point. to put it bluntly, i can use that eugnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5840061.post-51445553342488450152008-05-12T09:57:00.002+08:002008-05-12T10:23:23.260+08:00stop and stare You start to wonder why you're 'here' not thereAnd you'd give anything to get what's fairBut fair ain't what you really needOh, can u see what I see________________________day duty is really getting to me. it seems like week after week of monotony, and not even an off day can provide the rest i crave. maybe it did and maybe i'm rejuvenated without knowing it, but i just seek an endeugnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5840061.post-35792029084449368322008-04-29T23:08:00.000+08:002008-04-29T23:53:22.914+08:00closureWoo hoo hooIt's all been doneWoo hoo hooIt's all been doneWoo hoo hooIt's all been done, beforea display of inner strength and resilience leaves me in awe of you, yet again, my lady love.eugnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5840061.post-75374589421456614442008-04-26T20:43:00.002+08:002008-04-26T21:09:41.346+08:00winter melon soupauntie shirley (a close family friend) came over with a pot of really good winter melon soup on thursday, and my folks saved a bowl for me. it wasn't good, but awesome (: spare ribs, dried scallop and soft gooey winter melon really made my day...and it made me think, of how all the ingredients lent their flavour to the soup. (for those who are wondering, i'm in a funny mood, but eugnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5840061.post-72874182839210795892008-04-25T15:36:00.002+08:002008-04-25T16:05:06.576+08:00wimpylet's see.-i'm at work now (God is merciful: the emails have stopped flowing in) and won't be out till tomorrow.-you'll be in malaysia till monday :(:(:(:(-got chewed out by mum and dad for nothing. I'LL GET MY UNI APPLICATION DONE LA. IN FACT I ALREADY HAVE THE DAMN TESTIMONIAL. DON'T PULL RANK ON ME PLEASE.-have no plans for the weekend, and it's not like i need quiet time. or do i?-eugnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5840061.post-35906749093875481632008-04-22T14:05:00.001+08:002008-04-22T14:15:03.213+08:00what's upTwenty-five years and my life is stillTrying to get up that great big hill of hopeFor a destinationAnd I realized quickly when I knew I shouldThat the world was made up of this brotherhood of manFor whatever that meansAnd so I cry sometimes when I'm lying in bedJust to get it all out, what's in my headAnd I am feeling a little peculiarAnd so I wake in the morning and I step outsideAnd I eugnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5840061.post-9099901289427188532008-04-19T10:53:00.002+08:002008-04-19T11:04:16.001+08:00all you needThere's nothing you can do that can't be doneNothing you can sing that can't be sungNothing you can say but you can learn how to play the gameIt's easyNothing you can make that can't be madeNo one you can save that can't be savedNothing you can do but you can learn how to be you in timeIt's easyAll you need is loveAll you need is loveAll you need is love, loveLove is all you eugnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5840061.post-84804733357421141422008-04-17T07:40:00.003+08:002008-04-17T11:39:22.546+08:00sturm und drangi think i'll change the template of this blog soon. it's too complicated, i think i'll settle for something simpler.well, things have reached a point where i can't really predict what's gonna happen anymore.i've just been nominated/arrowed for the overall-i/c post, which may or may not be a bad thing. what do you know, i'm still gonna end up a leader. albeit without the rank.argh eugnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5840061.post-23522631614369582682008-04-15T17:24:00.002+08:002008-04-15T17:28:47.974+08:00little by little, everydaywhat does it mean?bit by bit, you advance, only to have one small fuck-up put you back at square one.and then? suddenly things are better. then they get so good, you're on a roll... then something screws up. something in proportion, or larger compared to what you've amassed, that brings you to your knees, and leaves no trace of what you've built up over that short periodeugnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5840061.post-14139805484096592222008-04-09T00:42:00.005+08:002008-04-10T17:19:55.603+08:00null and voidbecause on hindsight, it wasn't my right to say that.eugnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5840061.post-76174965659379554292008-04-07T13:13:00.001+08:002008-04-07T13:15:50.612+08:00weepinglook at you all...still my guitar gently weeps.eugnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5840061.post-37155202808579733842008-03-27T12:07:00.003+08:002008-03-27T12:17:05.587+08:00waltzing matilda eugnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5840061.post-28277312496375939462008-03-25T09:37:00.002+08:002008-03-25T09:39:43.358+08:00a quiet angeri hate what you're doing to her.(pardon me for that one-liner but that's all i could think of for now.)eugnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5840061.post-8210973477626803362008-03-23T22:23:00.002+08:002008-03-23T23:34:23.170+08:00risenhappy easter, everyone (: hope springs anew!right, now i'll begin ranting.it's been a tumultous lenten season. but we grow with it each time, i guess. and even with easter being an absolutely joyous occasion, we cannot forget the little kinks in our lives (and i guess, the lives of others, since that matters to us as well), that need to be ironed out. Christ saved us for a purpose. think eugnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5840061.post-55795437856604149162008-03-22T10:20:00.002+08:002008-03-22T10:46:27.093+08:00breezycouldn't think of a proper title here, but this is the best that can come close to describing my mood. because there's no point feeling strongly about something if there isn't anything to feel strongly for at the moment, yes?let's see. it's a quiet saturday, and i have duty tomorrow. nothing new.well, i've been thinking about omens lately. not the real hardcore ones, but the subtle signs eugnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5840061.post-61406545105556800152008-03-20T13:13:00.002+08:002008-03-22T08:48:50.033+08:00cheersMaking your way in the world today Takes everything you've got; Taking a break from all your worries Sure would help a lot.Wouldn't you like to get away?All those night when you've got no lights,The check is in the mail; And your little angel Hung the cat up by it's tail; And your third fiance didn't show; Sometimes you want to go Where everybody knows your name, And they're always glad youeugnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5840061.post-2611447920300278632008-03-17T14:27:00.006+08:002008-03-22T08:46:12.375+08:00-randomi've been tagged! (by mel, that is.) so here are the instructions:Choose a song which can't stop running through your mind. google it via youtube. Tag 5 of your friends to do the same.righto, and i choose ronald, alicia, yudon, simone, and janice! though i'm not sure when they'll see this.by the way, this is the video i've chosen: Village People - Y.M.C.Ahahahahaha but it was on my mind, eugnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5840061.post-79395623169074399742008-03-15T22:34:00.002+08:002008-03-15T22:36:50.494+08:00dissipationi was expecting disappointment, regret and shame. but instead i swelled with pride and joy. congrats, you two (: you've earned it!and thank you, God.eugnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5840061.post-56556828536761751832008-03-06T23:12:00.002+08:002008-03-06T23:22:43.069+08:00yieldi give inat work now, blogging because my friend borrowed my psp charger. if not i'd be wailing on that green plesioth.oh heck. long john silvers' breakfast tomorrow, chicken steak in thick toast (along with that special someone), can't wait!eugnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5840061.post-71808037153349282552008-03-05T19:17:00.002+08:002008-03-05T19:20:05.151+08:00fortitudebe strong; God has chosen this path for a reason.BUT WHAT FOR?BUT WHY?eugnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5840061.post-51137498833762231952008-03-02T16:39:00.003+08:002008-03-02T18:40:02.405+08:00magnifiqueand now i have 365 posts.the usual grouses still remain. changed? perhaps i have. not giving a shit about certain things does help. maybe i will tell my boss, on my very last day, that i never gave a shit at all.but that's 254 days more. ah, how i yearn to be free of my shackles, and to be able to write "Mr" in front of my name, instead of "CPL" (when it could never be "2LT" or "LTA" oreugnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5840061.post-40838246259075037112008-02-25T14:24:00.000+08:002008-02-25T14:25:32.504+08:00burn for youI got myself into some trouble tonightGuess I'm just feeling blueIts been so long since I've seen your faceThis distance between me and youThat voice you showed me is not the one I knowI must be strung out on what I doDon't hang up againThere's nothing else I know how to doBut I burn for youWhat am I going to doI burn for youBurn for youI guess it feels like you're always aloneAnd I eugnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5840061.post-17552368254487782362008-02-19T19:17:00.002+08:002008-02-19T19:29:51.603+08:00you and meit's either i need sleep, more work to do (as if today wasn't enough), or i'm just too damn emo today.maybe it's just a combination of both.sometimes i don't know what you're trying to achieve."you're everywhere and nowhere baby, that's where you're at." (i'm shamelessly quoting a jeff beck song here, but who listens to that nowadays anyway?)i wish i could understand.i wish i could eugnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5840061.post-59414480578589319382008-02-13T19:00:00.002+08:002008-02-13T19:30:51.008+08:00nasi lemakthis should be titled "my epiphany", actually. but what the heck.so why "nasi lemak"? well, it was over a packet of nasi lemak at breakfast today, while at work, that i had an epiphany. or rather, THE epiphany, which is gonna tide me through the rest of my ns life. yes, this is another ns-themed entry. (on a side note, complaining helps you to vent your frustration, rather than keeping eugnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5840061.post-58169602058061154012008-02-11T23:02:00.000+08:002008-02-11T23:18:45.751+08:00captain crash and the beauty queen from marsrealised how i've not blogged for a while. (because well i like the previous entry. it's the most sense i've made in a while. i hope i've not turned anyone off romantic comedies, because they deserve to make money. really!)ah, what do i say? tough day at work, work's spilling over (yea yea, i don't chiong sua. how bad can it get? think about it. "eugnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5840061.post-30353605314658435662008-02-06T00:24:00.000+08:002008-02-06T01:18:42.779+08:00amazingly true!eugene's guide to writing your own sweet, funny, romantic comedy blockbuster hit:THE SETTING:1. first, get 2 suave looking actors, an an adorable actress, or vice versa. (choice picks include jude law, reese witherspoon, mark ruffalo, kate winslet. james marsden and katherine heigl seem to be surprisingly appropriate as well)2. pair them up. a good suggestion is to have the lead eugnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5840061.post-21886037823974093692008-01-30T11:14:00.000+08:002008-01-30T11:50:56.578+08:00WHY?"I am disgruntled! And up until now I was relatively gruntled!" - Homer Simpson since he has a bit of free time, the great eugene will now rant about his ever-constant pet peeves, in the form of rhetorical and mostly nonsensical questions, in no particular order.1) WHY does it seem ever so impossible to run more than 4km in one sitting? 2) WHY does that supposedly tiny, seemingly eugnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5840061.post-74601072114626079162008-01-28T10:12:00.000+08:002008-01-28T11:10:10.697+08:00twenty ZOMG I'M BLOODY OLDthanks for all the wishes (: there are (surprisingly) loads of people who remembered, so well, argh. i'm just too brain dead to write down who. but yea if you did wish me, THANK YOUUUUUUUUUUUUU! hahaha. and to think i was actually content with letting the day pass quietly.so what happened in between this entry and the last?let's see. thursday and friday was spent lazing eugnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5840061.post-33995466585163505642008-01-23T17:23:00.000+08:002008-01-23T18:09:40.319+08:00blissyet another reflective entry. it's pretty much struck me how blessed i am, really. and being fully aware of it is all the more self-fulfilling. i'm happy, even thought i don't realise it sometimes.what's in a birthday? with each year that passes, it becomes less special, just another noteworthy day, which comes and goes. and i'm perfectly fine with it. yea, it's not a big thing.which is why eugnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5840061.post-24656835452843528002008-01-15T08:00:00.000+08:002008-01-19T23:28:49.291+08:00extreme boredomi'm back! and as the title implies, well....i ripped this off someplace else:Step 1: Put your MP3 player or whatever on random.Step 2: Post the first line(s) from the first 20 songs that play, no matter how embarrassing the song.Step 3: Post and let everyone you know guess what song and artist the lines come from.Step 4: Strike out the songs when someone guesses correctly (No lyriceugnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5840061.post-88836567995946591412008-01-09T23:03:00.000+08:002008-01-09T23:54:57.904+08:00"you were meant for greater things"was i, really? i've had people tell me this so often. and yet, i can't help but be envious. of others, that is. those who've got opportunities, and those who simply don't care. why i can't just resign myself to the ranks of the latter, i can't fathom either.i was browsing through facebook profiles, looking for old friends, when i chanced upon... an acquaintance eugnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5840061.post-65084240649696684252008-01-07T22:58:00.000+08:002008-01-07T23:44:13.775+08:00jadedas the title suggests, this is but another one of the many blog entries detailing how tired i am. or maybe how i need to get back into full gear.so how about if i start with how the day went?right, that's unusual. anyhow, i got half a day of my leave eaten (which was supposed to be last year's leave, but they pushed it to this year and now i ONLY HAVE ELEVEN DAYS LEFT, THOSE COCKSUCKERS.) eugnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5840061.post-11959894051218401742008-01-05T17:38:00.000+08:002008-01-05T22:47:45.263+08:00antidotei've been thinking about what life in the UK will be like. and i realise that apart from missing her, everything else should just be about peachy. heh.no no, i'm serious. it's like thinking about heaven, from our point of view right now. (although the UK would definitely pale in comparison.) i look at where i am, and now i can't wait to leave. i miss everything about being a student. eveneugnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5840061.post-89214763125660908472008-01-01T19:40:00.000+08:002008-01-01T20:37:29.560+08:00scar tissuea post dating about 364 days back:"Scar tissue that I wish you sawSarcastic mister know-it-allClose your eyes and I'll kiss you causeWith the birds I'll shareWith the birds I'll shareThis lonely viewWith the birds Ill shareThis lonely viewokay, not exactly. now that i'm awake, more rational, and more reflective (why does that word keep popping up), i think i'll try to recall, tackle eugnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5840061.post-383949653058211082008-01-01T00:43:00.000+08:002008-01-01T19:38:33.474+08:00life's been good(?)I have a mansion Forget the price Ain't never been there They tell me it's niceI live in hotels Tear out the walls I have accountants Pay for it allThey say I'm crazy but I have a good time I'm just looking for clues at the scene of the crime Life's been good to me so farMy Maserati Does one eighty-five I lost my license Now I don't driveI have a limo Ride in the back I lock eugnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5840061.post-79181410993540860432007-12-29T16:44:00.000+08:002007-12-29T16:52:59.188+08:00castles made of sandDown the street you can hear her scream "You're a disgrace"As she slams the door in his drunken faceAnd now he stands outsideAnd all the neighbours start to gossip and droolHe cries "Oh, girl you must be mad,What happened to the sweet love you and me had?"Against the door he leans and starts a scene,And his tears fall and burn the garden greenAnd so castles made of sand fall eugnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5840061.post-85423843451439129142007-12-23T01:00:00.000+08:002007-12-26T10:23:34.370+08:00so close to reaching that famous happy end.a moment of clarity; a long time's worth of salvation. i'm glad for you, friend.went for alicia's church function, or should i say, christmas bash. was really inspired by the energy of it all, the devotion of the worshippers, the praise and worship band, and the pastor's impassioned (and also light-hearted) sermon. i think it's all the same God we eugnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5840061.post-42035733534819219832007-12-18T13:01:00.000+08:002007-12-18T13:39:23.669+08:00time after timethe past two weeks have been immensely trying. i guess we must all look to the future, and forget all that has recently happened. let go.there have been certain perk-me-ups that have happened to me this week though, i must say. -there's definitely the insanely-devoted, impossibly-patient, and incredibly caring girlfriend of mine.-my ipod playlist (which i picked at random), that eugnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5840061.post-41331886082763555922007-12-15T09:52:00.000+08:002007-12-15T11:00:58.891+08:00the rubik's cubei talk with him as usual, he pours out his problems. they've been destroying him, the problems have. he picks up his rubik's cube, trying to distract himself. he twists harder and harder, each move bringing him further away from the perfection that many desire. "it's not meant to be like this," he explains. "everything turns out right in the end. or rather, it's supposed to. but eugnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5840061.post-57376742206467133412007-12-13T13:04:00.000+08:002007-12-13T14:01:09.200+08:00unfinished; unsettledi try to deviate from emo entries. but somehow i always keep coming back to them. right, so this won't be emo. just frustrated. okay, emo.this isn't for you, jeanette, so don't worry (: but you might know who.(i don't think many people read this blog anyway, so "dedicating" these entries to anybody won't work, i guess. still, this is how i feel.)firstly, you. i'd appreciate eugnoreply@blogger.com